A mysterious set of Gears of War 2 screenshots recently made their way online and look to be pictures of a never before seen multiplayer map that could release as new downloadable content. Screens after the break.

The nine screenshots (galleried below) show what look to be a multiplayer map that is surrounded by gorgeous yellow imulsion. And from what we can tell, the screens seem legit and one could easily speculate we’ll be receiving some multiplayer map DLC in the near future. Also remember to check out our Gears 2 LE giveaway post.

Some comics you have to dig through to see if they’re good. No need with Comic Book Comics: Our Artists At War! The cover features a wild image of a giant flaming comic book smashing a military blimp and crushing tanks as desperate gunners look up and at the reader.

The team of Fred Van Lente and the illustrator Ryan Dunlavey (no relation to Anton) get right down to brass tacks with ribald just-the-gags-ma’am writing. Aside from the occasional full-panel art, every sentence or two is lettered with a hilarious accompanying panel that is perfectly suited to the words.

OAAW is a scholarly work on the artists of the 1930s, 40s and 50s. While solidly researched, the writing is a rare combination of eloquence and madcap humor. If you’re not getting a funny tidbit of information from the text, Dunlavey makes sure to illustrate it in an action-packed or riotous fashion.

The issue starts with the dynamics of comic writing in crowded writers’ “bullpens” and shows the seamy odds they faced, lavished with quotes from Jules Pfeiffer and Joe Kubert. A map shows how Manhattan was the birthplace of the mainstream comic scene. From there, it’s a synopsis of the big boss players of the time: Lloyd Jacquet; copycat king Martin Goodman; the shady Harry Donnenfeld; Max Fleischer; Walt Disney. Then a disillusioned young Stan Lee and Jack Kirby enter into intrigues with Jerry Siegel.

World War II arrives, setting the comic world on its ear, and the issue details the roles of Kirby, Lee, Charles Addams, and Will Eisner; we learn how Eisner’s efforts led comics for a purely propaganda-based role into training manuals.

Disney’s ugly side as a strikebuster is touched on before the comic mentions his change of focus from movies to work for the armed forces. The issue recounts unsettling anecdotes where a stressed-out executive used to hurl after every meeting with Disney and an artist knew his boss had checked his work overnight from a Chesterfield butt left in his ashtray. Then OAAW touches on Walt’s growing bunker mentality and aim toward a 3-D demesne he could keep dictatorial over: Disneyland. At the end of the WWII section, Kirby is depicted as almost losing his life to an art-related job: scouting hot zones in Europe for enemy troops and sending back sketches of anything suspicious.

Post-war, with domestic tranquility arriving hand in hand with a baby boom, the female demographic begins to have its say in the comic world as stock in superheroes plummets. The famous team of Simon and Kirby, by then battle-hardened and taking smack from no one, launches Young Romance, selling an amazing 92% of the first 500,000 issues. As an amusing side note, Martin Goodman releases a series of mediocre copycats, true to form. The humorous narrative doesn’t let up, with freelancers pranking Simon and Kirby with raunchy drawings tucked in final drafts of YR.

For a brief time, the comics industry flourishes unchecked. But then the innocence of the medium fades with the ghoulish turnaround of EC Comics and the BDSM-birthed Wonder Woman. Al Feldstein makes strides in breaking the factory mentality, letting artists introduce their own styles, as one Dr. Frederic Wertham, forensic psychiatrist, sets the stage for a colossal showdown on Capitol Hill.

What will happen? A big teaser ad for issue #3 promises R. Crumb, and Andy Warhol and more of the insidious Doctor.

I can’t wait. Comic Book Comics is a technically sound treat and would make Scott McCloud proud.

Writing/Dialogue: A rollicking “way it was” look that belies the goofy PSA movies of the time. Imagine Archie Bunker telling you all about it, no holds barred. A

Art: Things look cartoony, which is fine considering the subject matter. There are never any dull panels and there is great synergy between the words and images. A lot of the fun is that neither hogs the spotlight 100% of the time, instead sharing the pages. A

Story: A fascinating, trivia-filled walk through the world of yesterday’s pop media. Something for everyone, from the smoldering anti-authoritarian to the bag and board-fondling aficionado. A

Characters: A little heavy on the anecdotal side, but what anecdotes! A-

Originality: A well-assembled historical study of the comics that made the country go round, a grand stage filled with gritty real-life heroes and checkered founding fathers. A+

Overall: This is the most entertaining account of anything historical I’ve read. Under-the-radar text and over-the-top illustrations (wait till you see the first cover of William Gaines’s EC Comics, and the real face behind Young Romance’s advice columns), with many laugh-out-loud moments and surprising revelations from the rascally formative years of the industry. A+

We have a new giveaway and this time it for all the marbles. We are giving away a Limited Edition copy Gears of War 2 along with some Gears swag (thanks to Game Crazy) and a medium VillainTech.com tshirt (medium is all we have in stock). Instructions on how to qualify after the break.

To be entered to win this giveaway, simply visit pcweenies.com, look at a few strips and tell us your favorite one. Seriously, that’s all you have to do to get a chance to score a free copy of this already platinum title. You’ll have until Tuesday the 25th, then we’ll pick a winner, assuming s/he follows the rules: (And yes, if you posted in the tshirt giveaways win or lose, you may post again in this one and you must post a comment to qualify for this giveaway)

• You may enter other VillainTech contests, however…
• You may only enter this contest once; if you enter more than once on this particular contest post you’ll be automatically disqualified and barred from all future giveaways. (Yes, we have robots that thoroughly check to ensure fairness.) You may enter future VillainTech giveaway contests though!
• You can only win once. (If you win and then try to go for a second prize during our giveaways, you’ll be automatically disqualified, etc. unless specified otherwise.)
• This contest is open to the US only, sorry!

After sitting through from start to finish the entire game of Silent Hill 2 I have had a real repect for the Silent Hill Series. I was familiar with the genre of Survival Horror just never witnessed a master piece that Silent Hill 2 is. (Grant it Fatal Frame is a very close contender) Well I skipped the PSP version after seeing it played. When I heard about Silent Hill Homecoming I became very excited. I saw the graphical limitations the game faced and felt with the Next Gen Consoles it could do no wrong.

Let’s start with the gameplay. Much like most survival horrors it takes place in a third person view. Which I found works quite well for the series. Yet the combat system was changed. I was kind of intrigued by it but felt it took away from the Survival Part considering how easy it was to waste most creatures. Essentially during combat you can use the B button to dodge if you add the thumbstick in there then you have directions where you can dodge. You have a light and a hard attack if you do a combo and end with a hard attack it stuns your opponent. It sounds good but it just makes the game a little easy. Most of the monsters can be taken out with the knife. There were sometimes where the dodge didn’t work out to well but largely it felt like you had most of the advantage. Now the second thing about this series that seemed to kinda fall by the side was the story. Silent Hill 2 kept you pretty involved with the story. This game doesn’t really give you a story but more like mission objectives. Which then took away from the whole exploration. I always felt Silent Hill was a personal journey into the psychosis of the character and solving the mystery of what’s going on. In Homecoming it feels more like going from Point A to B and finding the boss Key to get through a Big Door. Later on in the game there are some puzzles that relate to the story but they largely felt out of place.

The graphics are where this game really shines. The creatures looked disgusting and the backgrounds just had such great atmosphere to them. One of the things with the environment is it always seemed to have something new to look at. It wasn’t just creepy buildings there was enough deversaty that it never felt repetitive. The transitions to Silent Hill were largely based on the movie but it still looked great. The Creatures all looked pretty fantastic. They all had great effects to them and they all seemed to fit with the environment really well. The bosses stand out the most with this graphical update. The Final boss really stood out. I don’t want to spoil the fun of seeing it but jeebus it was creepy! The only downside in the graphic department was the lip moving. It didn’t really seem to sync to well with the dialogue. Often times the character wouldn’t really open their mouths while talking. It was a bit odd but the details on the character models made up for it.

The sound was also an area where this game really shows it’s power. The original composer of the series is back and the music was great. It set a very strange tone to the game which really added to atmosphere. The Creatures sounds were solid and just nasty sounding at times. They used the Surround Sound element really well to really make you feel like your in the game. From just all the little noises from the levels. To the big Air Raid Siren. It really pulled you in. At Times the dialogue was a bit off however nothing terribly bad.

Overall the game is pretty good. It has some downsides to the game but overall it was done pretty well. It’s no Silent Hill 2 but I don’t think that game will ever be topped in the Silent Hill Series. If your looking for a little Survival Horror this might be a game you want to check out.

Yet the novella didn’t appeal to me.  First, there was art.  No expense was spared on it, though its painstaking style, with its weak lines, made me hunt for objects of interest in each scene.  Still, early 20th-century England couldn’t be drawn much better.  The bustle of the streets is well captured, with minor steampunk elements side by side with horse-drawn carriages, much like the early automobile shared the streets with its four-legged predecessor.

I didn’t like the story until the last few pages, but those last pages revealed why AM was filled with dialogue aping a Sherlock Holmes episode.  There were a Sax Raker and a Dr. Watcham, replete with astounding rapid-fire deductions, eccentricities, and a plot picking up after Holmes — uh, I mean Raker — went over the falls with Professor Moriarty — uh, I mean “The Man Who Was Not There”.  In fact, everything is almost totally derivative.

But… Ellis does this for a purpose, and he’s within his rights for doing so.  Strange? Yes.  Highly creative, and the mark of a writer used to crafting stories within stories? That too.  This comic takes storytelling to an art form that can easily be glossed over by someone lacking literary analytical skills.  Ellis does a decent job setting up a pseudo-Holmesian scene, complete with period dialogue. To a comic reader who’s never experienced Sherlock Holmes before, the dry dialogue will read more amusingly.   But to an Arthur Conan Doyle aficionado, the text doesn’t do more than appeal with a few distracting echoes.  Again, it’s intentional.

As for steampunk, a few terms and concepts are weakly worked in, like cavorite, and apergy, and aetheric mechanics, but as the work concludes, things travel more toward the Twilight Zone, borrowing Einstein’s street cred for a plot twist that only happens in B movies, comics, and paperbacks.  I’ll have to try dropping a PS3 in a hadron collider and see what happens sometime; maybe this is why so many people will continue to be afraid of atom smashers and their kin.

Characters: B-. Nothing we haven’t seen before until the last few pages: “Sherlock Holmes”, “Dr. Watson”, a “brassy pseudo-Victorian lady”.  True, Holmes was never the life of the fraternity, and imitating his speech is daunting for anyone, but I had hoped that the story’s premise would have been chaotic enough to allow a more schizophrenic representation of this imposter detective.  While Raker conversed with Watcham within his chambers, it seemed as if very little of the final explanation had been applied.

Art: A-. The effort and detail are there, but too undifferentiated for my tastes.  Almost everyone in the city has a hat and mustache, making it a chore to find Dr. Watcham.  Perhaps I am an ugly American for seeing it this way, but after being spoiled by the synergetic art of Lucifer, it leaves me wanting a spark of Clowes-style emotive closeups or a dash of shading.

Story & Dialogue: B. Rawther dry; it’s a comic novella about people imitating Sherlock Holmes.  Lots of flavor text geared toward the Baker Street fanman, but I find myself missing the blue-collar bite of Golly or the constant zingers of Knights of the Dinner Table.  To quote Mark Twain: “eschew surplusage”.  I appreciated the main story concept a little better few days after first reading, but I think the hints could have been a little more flamboyant.

Color: N/A (Black and white).

Originality: B+. Ellis had to copy a master work of English literature; whether the reader can forgive him or will just bore through the story is about a 25-75 proposition.  To a person who delights in having every last word in ultra-niche forums, it is likely the former; to one raised in the shallow wading pool of pop culture, the borrowed concepts will seem put through a hydraulic press and dropped out sausage style.

Excitement: D+. One extended office chat, a lot more talking, an aerial bombardment and one very cool flashback.  Things ramp up in the last few pages, enough that the book could have been just those few pages without much editing or any major loss.  Re-read it, and your rediscovery of a few glossed-over details will bring the excitement level up to a C.  Kudos to the artists who devised the one-panel steampunk nightmare.

Overall: C+. The fact it’s a “graphic novella” should have been enough warning; it tried very ambitiously to achieve critical mass, but the nature of the story hobbled the enjoyment of it till the very end.  A shame because it could have been much more.  Perhaps, given a rework, it may someday be.

Regular readers of Villaintech are familiar with my preoccupation with zombies. I’m particularly fond of the fast ones, ala Dawn of the Dead, or the rage-infected in 28 Days Later. Left 4 Dead, therefore, looks to be a very promising thriller of a game.

I am most intrigued by the set-up of the game. It is a four person multiplayer cooperative shooter, and the squad must fight its way through an army of running zombies. But the most interesting aspect of gameplay is the collection of four mutated zombies, each with their own particular brand of awesomeness. These four “super” zombies are also player controlled, which is unusual, but highly fabulous, especially for a zombie sympathizer such as myself.

A fansite for the game provided these very handy descriptions of the four zombie players:

The Hunter –

The Hunter is a normal looking infected that wears a dark, hooded sweatshirt and leaps from the shadows upon unsuspecting Survivors to maul them.

The Hunter is able to pounce great distances to land upon the Survivors and proceed to shred their flesh from bone. In order to do this attack, the Hunter must crouch or crawl until the pounce is charged up. The Survivor is held helpless and the Hunter cannot end this attack until the Survivor is killed or the Hunter is knocked off. The Hunter may also use this leap to barrel into a Survivor and knock them backwards, possibly off of a ledge. This attack has no cooldown.

The Hunter is able to wall jump to reach areas that would be otherwise unattainable.
The Hunter has the ability to regenerate health, allowing him to escape and rest up for another attack.

The Smoker –

The Smoker is an average sized boss infected covered in growths and boils and has a fifty foot long tongue as its primary weapon. He also releases clouds of smoke.

The Smoker’s tongue is fired at the head of a Survivor and wraps around their neck. The Smoker can choke its victim from above by hanging them from its tongue. A choking Survivor is unable to move or attack until another Survivor rescues them. During its tongue attack, the Smoker is helpless, even if it misses. This attack has a cooldown.

When at a more horizontal angle from the victim, the Smoker can use its tongue to pull a Survivor towards itself, moving the Survivor away from his or her team. Further, this action poisons the Survivor. The longer the Smoker pulls the Survivor, the more the Survivor’s health is poisoned. If the Smoker completely pulls the Survivor to itself, all of the Survivor’s health is poisoned. Poisoned health slowly ticks down until a medkit is used.

When the Smoker is shot he releases an obscuring cloud of smoke, limiting the Survivor’s vision. A smoke cloud is also released around the Smoker with every tongue attack.

The Tank –

The Tank is a giant beast with an abnormally muscular upper body who relies on his health and strength to pummel the Survivors and lob debris. It is only playable several times throughout a campaign, as this boss is considerably more powerful than the other infected.

The Tank uses its speed and large amount of health to close the distance and slam the Survivors with its massive fists, knocking them back and doing a lot of damage. If the Survivor is knocked down, the Tank can bash the Survivor until they are dead.

The Tank can smash cars to send them flying towards the Survivors. If there is no car around, the Tank will rip a chunk of earth from the ground and toss it.

The Tank is able to smash through certain areas in walls to surprise the Survivors.

When the Director chooses to spawn a Tank, a player is randomly chosen to play it. The Tank has a frustration meter that forces it to find the Survivors. If it does not find the Survivors in this time, the player loses control of the Tank and the computer takes over.

The Boomer –

The Boomer is an obese methane-filled boss infected covered with boils whose main form of attack is projectile vomit, but also explodes when shot.

The Boomer’s vomit is released in one large attack, and in the right circumstances can hit more than one target. The vomit obscures the vision of its victims, and also acts as a pheromone to both existing infected, and causes more to be spawned and attack the victims. This attack has a cooldown.

If the Boomer drops from a high enough height, it will “pop” and blood will spread to any Survivors in the immediate area, having the same effect as a vomit attack would.

When successfully shot at, the Boomer explodes which covers any nearby Survivors with puke.

(AWESOME.)

The story is your basic city-plagued-by-virus routine. You, along with three other uninfected survivors, must blast your way out of the city. The four survivors are Bill, veteran of the Vietnam war, Louis, an assistant manager at the local Circuit City (soon out of a job), Zoey, the teenage daughter of a wealthy family (who, judging from the preview clips, has the ability to kick a lot of ass, Buffy-style) and Francis, the tattooed biker dude.

Where are they headed? To the countryside? That is my favorite question to ask of this genre. In the remake of Dawn of the Dead, the survivors make for an island in the middle of a lake, only to find that the island inhabitants have been infected. While the survivors of Left 4 Dead do have guns and ammo, the real question is…where can they go?

The game is set for a November 18th release for PC. I’ll post a review as soon as I get the chance to play this baby.

His books were like a fantasy/science fiction nerd’s rite of passage. Along with Stephen King, he was crucial in helping youngsters transition into the world of adult literature. With some of the wackiest ideas ever put to page (an amusement park full of dinosaurs? Really?), author Michael Crichton will be remembered for his creativity and vast output of interesting and imaginative novels.

Source.

Inspired by this post. Now, this is not a definitive list, and I may have missed a role that really defined some of these women and their careers. Enlighten me. Is there another actress who you feel is totally underrated and underappreciated? Would love to hear your opinions and contributions to the list!

So do I think that any of these lovely ladies could win an Oscar like the divine Ms. Tilda Swinton up there? No, perhaps not. But they are still worthy of some credit and better roles.

Fairuza Balk: Sure, she was the adorable dumpling in “The Worst Witch,” but she also strayed into some seriously strange and exciting acting roles in her formative years. With some a-typical turns as the angry teen wiccan in The Craft, and the understated, sensitive Trudi in Gas, Food, Lodging, Fairuza always seemed to fall just shy of the spotlight. Following the monumental disaster of The Island of Dr. Moreau, she has drifted in and out of the Hollywood consciousness, mostly in supporting roles and Adam Sandler vehicles. Would love for her to return to dominate the screen.

Lacey Chabert: She is forever a teenager because of that squeaky adolescent voice. It’s about time that Lacey grew out of bit parts in Not Another Teen Movie and Mean Girls, and stepped up to more adult roles. She just seems like she has more to offer than she has in the past, and I always found her very likeable. It would be great to see her attempt a more mature acting style.

Laura Elena Harring: A beautiful woman with a mysterious and seductive quality, she really burst onto the scene in David Lynch’s Mulholland Dr. Apart from that role, however, she has had scant success, playing the uncredited “Beth’s Mom” in One Missed Call, and the potential love interest Cathryn (many of her scenes were summarily and unjustly cut) in one of my favorite films, Willard. She appears to have a few projects coming up, but this actress definitely deserves more.

Zoe Saldana: Gorgeous. Talented. Feisty. She stole the show in Center Stage, and I was nearly heartbroken that she wasn’t given a bigger role in Pirates of the Caribbean (or even a role at all in its sequels). Thankfully she has a chance to break through in the upcoming Star Trek. Cross your fingers…

Clea DuVall: Apart from always being the grumpy outcast, Clea does have versatility. She can be the grumpy teenaged outcast (The Faculty), the grumpy FBI Agent outcast (“Heroes”), and the grumpy ghost-viewing outcast (The Grudge). Come on girl. Give me something, anything different.

Warning: This review contains spoilers and some adult conversation that may cause itching and burning sensations, specifically in the ocular area. Proceed with caution.

Blindness

Rated R: For disturbing violence, disturbing sexuality, and disturbing images. (Did I mention it’s disturbing? Because yes.)

Starring: Julianne Moore, Mark Ruffalo, Gael Garcia Bernal, Maury Chaykin (!), and Danny Glover.

IMDb Rating: 7.2
RottenTomatoes: 42% Rotten

Sample Review:

A stark, uncompromising look at a dark part of human existence exposed when the most basic sense is taken away.

Obviously there is a fair bit of discrepancy between the entirely user-driven IMDb rating and the RottenTomatoes meter, which is based completely on critics’ rating. I’m not entirely sure why, but I’ll venture a guess that it has something to do with the way this film was marketed.

The trailer for Blindness was spooky. It promised a world-wide epic disaster film on par with The Happening or The Stand. It was neither of those things. Blindness is a deeply resonant character study that comments on the degradation of a society due to hysteria and social control. I equate it more to the film Children of Men. Yes, at times the film is spooky, but the discomfort comes not from the affliction itself, but from the animalistic behavior of those who suffer from it.

So the movie isn’t a horror or a thriller, though there is tension throughout. It begins on a relatively normal day in a normal city, where a man becomes caught in traffic…and goes blind. But this isn’t the typical darkness that most people attribute to blindness. Instead, we get a glimpse of his perspective, and are greeted by a milky white film that permeates his vision. Immediately, concerned citizens flock to help him, and one in particular drives him home, before promptly stealing the blind man’s car. This theme of being taken advantage of becomes a thread throughout the rest of the film.

The man’s wife takes him to the optometrist (Ruffalo) who is flummoxed; he has never been exposed to this kind of instant white blindness. Except that he has, because the next morning he wakes up and cannot see.

His wife, Julianne Moore, shows no symptoms of the apparent disease that is causing cases of blindness to spring up all over the city, and accompanies her husband to be quarantined under the false pretense that she is blind as well.

The disease is a quiet one, infecting almost everyone who comes in contact with the carrier. The CDC swiftly dispatches to clean up the mess before it can spread further, collecting the carriers and depositing them in a abandoned hospital. Soon, the ward is crowded and locked, guarded twenty-four hours a day to ensure that no one escapes. Now, the blind are no longer locked up for precaution…they are prisoners.

This is when the film takes a turn from intriguing to down-right depressing. The ward of the blind becomes a festering, putrid place. Though the doctor’s wife attempts to retain order and keep the place clean, she is merely one person in a sea of confusion. She maintains the deceit, attempting to keep the peace.

A group of trouble-makers in Ward 3 declares themselves the rulers of the food supply and demand money and goods. Soon, The King of Ward 3 (Bernal) goes a step further, demanding women be sent up in exchange for food. Apparently, the brutal (though blurry and confused) group rape scene that ensues affected American audiences in a profound way. The boards on the IMDb are full of commentary about how uncomfortable the scene made audiences.

I was affected by the scene, but not in an uncomfortable way. It felt, at its core, entirely realistic, and cruelly sad. Without this scene, I felt the film would have lacked the power of simply how animalistic those trapped in this enclosed Hell had become.

The performances were very good in the film, especially from Julianne Moore. Her anguish and despair at being the only sighted person trying to care for the blind masses is palpable, and her heartbreak runs deep. I was especially surprised to see Maury Chaykin (the suicidal General from the first few minutes of Dances with Wolves) in a hilariously vile role.

If you enjoyed Children of Men, and its bleak, dystopian view of society, then this film is for you. While Blindness is not the caliber of the aforementioned, it certainly causes a lot of thought about the world and your fellow human beings. And sometimes those are the best films.

After the first three Saw movies, I was very reluctant to say it is a B movie series.? It would have been a slap in the face to countless actors, production staff, and writers.? After witnessing dozens of memorable scenes from Saw I through Saw III, I’d have gladly called it an A- series.? True, it did sometimes dip here and there, but the films always left unforgettable impressions and portrayals of humanity’s deeper, blacker side.

However, after seeing the step down from Saw III to Saw IV, and the somewhat off-kilter gore tour through Saw V, I am downgrading my opinion of the series.???

Saw V leads you to think it begins like all the rest of the series has: with a victim facing death or a twisted, maiming “redemption” at the hands of Jigsaw, the architect turned tormenter and self-perceived killer-savior of many.? But this is not Jigsaw’s work.? It is a copycat’s; the trap, designed to stop after permanently disfiguring and disabling its victim with crushed hands, kills its victim after he accepts his punishment.

Who is the copycat?

It’s none other than the treacherous Lt. Hoffman, who had a part in the deaths of officers Mathews (sp) and Rigg in Saw IV.? But when did it happen?

Cut to more events just after the events in Saw III (again, just like in Saw IV).? Hoffman is seen leaving the trap-loaded warehouse just after the death of his mentor Jigsaw, and just after the lethal “testing” of Officer Rigg.? And Agent Strahm, after shooting grief-crazed Jeff Reinhart in Saw III, finds himself challenged to accept his fate in Jigsaw’s death chamber, now sealed shut by Hoffman.??? Strahm, one of the sharpest characters in the series, discovers a secret exit.? A tape placed further down a passageway offers him one last chance at salvation.? He ignores it, is attacked by an assailant wearing a pig mask, and blacks out.? He comes to in a horrifying, seeming unalterable drowning trap.? A deus ex machina allows him to escape.

It is here that, while the escape is a brilliant move on Strahm’s part, shows the sloppiness of his captor, the same bumbling fallibility that maimed the first victim of the movie.

After viewers are left hanging for an entire movie, guessing about the fate of Jeff Reinhart’s daughter, allegedly (and low-budgetedly) caught in an offscreen timed oxygen-deprivation trap, Hoffman triumphantly boosts his career, “escaping” the scene of Jigsaw’s last stand with Jeff’s daughter Corbett.? However, Strahm too manages to escape and one of the best scenes in the movie takes place: a baffled Hoffman loses his composure as he sees Strahm being carried away on a stretcher.? Hoffman has more cleanup work to do.

In yet another videotape, but this time one filmed more tenderly than those he made for his victims, Jigsaw records a final message for his alienated ex-wife, milfy, makeup-paralyzed Jill Tuck.? After all the smack talk Jigsaw gave his victims, this tape rings hollow, and instead of helping me sympathize with Jigsaw as a pained husband, it makes my skin crawl.

And the exchange between Jigsaw’s attorney and Tuck just goes awry.? It seems wooden, cliched, and Tuck’s character seems almost as lifeless as Jigsaw’s puppet Billy.? To quote Brad Pitt in Se7en, “what’s in the bawwwwx?”? Guess I’ll need to pay $10.50 to find out.

Strahm, at deceased Agent Perez’s blood-stained bedside, confronts Hoffman with Perez’s last whisper, “Hoffman” (so?).? Emotive slab of beef Costas Mandylor, as Hoffman, rattles off well-worn threats to Strahm.? It sounds like he doesn’t even believe his own words.

?Strahm then begins doing research on Hoffman’s past, leading him to the death of the Hoff’s sister at her boyfriend’s hands, and the death of her boyfriend at Hoffman’s.? Here the Saw back story begins to fill in, bridging story gaps from Saw I through Saw III.? In a nutshell, it says: Hoffman was helping too.? There seems to be absolutely no credibility in Hoffman’s conversation and conversion with Jigsaw.? With a gun barrel tucked between his legs pointed right at big H’s face through most of the conversation, it’s like Psycho meets Brokeback Mountain.? It is interesting how Jigsaw shows mercy to Hoffman above and beyond his usual hair-trigger actions, but Hoffman is so hostile and foul-mouthed it seems the only reason Jigsaw would decide to tutor him is to use him.

Anyhoo, enter the meat and potatoes of the movie: five seemingly unacquainted people begin a harrowing journey through four lethal trapped rooms.? There’s a cute and fluffy fire inspector (Ashley), a washed-out playboy (Mallick), an improbably chesty city planner (Luba), a cold, calculating real estate company owner (Brit), and a bitchy, scene-stealing journalist (Charles) who could be the scourge of any Starbucks.? Only Charles manages to stand out; the rest may as well be Jigsaw’s mannequins, with boring officespeak and random bits of overacting to punctuate things.?

Here, by turns, are some of the nastiest, most ingenious, visually different traps in the series.?? Surrounded by gorgeous, deeply grim industrial settings, these traps are second only to those in Saw III.? This time, there’s a perverse team motif to each trap, with a vicious lesson taught by the last trap.

I usually miss problems in the script, but there were a few in this section of the movie.? One of the traps was based on an arcane bit of electrical know-how.? Why would the characters, more comfortable sipping lattes than talking wiring, have the slightest inkling of how the trap could work properly?? And the final trap could have been overcome by, of all things, peeing in it.? There is a bathtub in the next to last room, filled with water.? With all the hyperventilation in the first two rooms, I would have thought the characters would have grabbed some water to drink, leaving them with full bladders, and one of them with the means to get it where it had to be in the trap.??

The cinematography through the rooms begins well, gets intense in the second room, winds down in the third room, and by the fourth room, everything is resolved with an irritating series of choppy strobes back and forth across the trap.? At the same time, the chemistry, or lack of, between the survivors hurts the viewing experience like the slow, dull throb of a recent hammer blow to the thumb.?

As the people navigate through the traps, or try to, Agent Strahm plays sneak ‘n’ peek with Hoffman’s files.? Hoffman begins a counterattack, leading him to deceive Strahm’s superior.? A lot of it is pretty dull and cliche, the ol’ framing routine.? Zzzzz.?

Hoffman just isn’t enough of an interesting character to base a movie around.? He lurks and skulks like Mr. Horse from Ren and Stimpy, with lines barely more interesting than “Mmmmmmmm”,”Ohhhhhhhhh”, and “No sir, I don’t like it.”? Where Jigsaw was powerfully bitter in his words and brutal in his ideas and deeds, Hoffman is an order-taker who lost his boss two movies ago.? All his nefarious deeds, including his dull taped messages, were all done better by Jigsaw.?

The movie manages to squeeze in one last trap at the end, but its activation and purpose are absurd and campy.? The trap bucks up at the end with a horrid, explicit payoff, but chances are the first half of the sequence will leave you with a bad foretaste.? And worst of all, the movie, aside from a lot of extra corpses, basically leaves off where it began.

Paging Tobin Bell and a ton of script doctoring…

During the age of the first Xbox after my overdose with the Halo Franchise I eyed a game that sounded very interesting. It was of course the first Fable. I became a huge fan of the game. When I heard there was a sequel I really got excited. Well after venturing through the lovely process of Amazon Launch Day delivery I finally got my copy. Grant it I was checking the mail box every couple of minutes before it arrived.

The gameplay is much the same of the first Fable game. Yet there are a lot of changes. One of the things that stands out a lot is the aspect of money. It really plays a big role in your game. What makes it not to frustrating is the fact money isn’t really to hard to come by. You can always do the jobs that appear around the towns from Bartending, Blacksmithing and Wood Cutting. It starts out a little tedious but as you get better at doing these you skill increases and so does the money you make. The money is largely used for making investments. You can pretty much buy everything in the town. Which I would recommend. Upon purchasing any of the houses or stores you bring in money about every 5 mins of gameplay. It starts out a little at a time but as you progress there is a steady amount of money that you can use in game for weapon upgrades and stuff. The Dog is also a interesting addition. The dog isn’t just there for looks either. I was quite amazed on how interactive the dog was. It will seek out things for you and also attack the baddies. The fight system has been revamped and it works out really well. I wasn’t sure how the one button fighting was going to work but it’s solid. Basic controls consist of X to attack, Y for long range, B for Magic, A for rolling and such. It really became pretty easy to do combos and there are some real neat Flourishes that you learn later in the game.

The Graphics to this game are gorgeous. One of the things I was looking at while playing was how does it compare to Oblivion. It certainly does a number on Oblivion. The only downside to it is the Load times between areas can be a little tedious. Lighting effects are gorgeous and the character models are really interesting. The did a great job of capturing emotion in each character and how they interact with you. The Dog also looks fantastic. It really looks like a dog and has a bunch of great animations that really sets it apart from other games.

The Sound was really nice. The game has a nice mellow tune to it that makes gameplay really relaxing. I really enjoyed the Irish tune they play while you out in Bower Stone Lake. It was a real interesting vibe that kinda set the whole feeling of the gameplay. Also a nice addition was the surround sound. You basically have gargoyles that your supposed to find. The way they interact with you is by insulting you. The purpose is to actually find them. It was always amusing to be walking around and here some trash talk behind me. The Dog also does a great job of giving that illusion that it’s running around you. You can always hear it around it makes the game feel very alive. The only downside in sound is sometimes the voice over can feel a little repetitive.

Overall the game is a pretty solid one. Despite the mix up with the Limited Edition boxes. I find this game to be a great follow up to the first one. It excels in many areas. If you in the mood for a interesting Action RPG with some great humor Fable 2 might be up your alley.

I imagine that most Villaintech readers are a little too old to be trick-or-treating. Still, the allure of dressing up for Halloween never truly goes away, and there are still parties and office shenanigans to be had, right? I searched the Interwebz for some of the nerdiest costumes ever, and boy have I succeeded…

Since dressing up over the age of 14 is inherently nerdy anyway, I attempted to stay away from the uber-corny online store offerings. There are some truly hilarious homemade costumes out there, and the ones I am showcasing are conveniently divided into several categories, for your viewing enjoyment.

Gaming

Figured I would start with a little Lego dude that I picked up. Sure, the paint’s coming off in places, but that’s some real styrofoam craftsmanship! Even the hands are spot-on…

Aww, now this is a couple’s costume done right! Who wouldn’t want their spouse/girlfriend as a slave that they could keep in a tiny, chuckable ball that they can pocket whenever they don’t feel like listening to their incessant whining?

Now, I have seen a few impressive Half-Life headcrabs in my day, but this one is fantastic. He’s even got the jerky movements down.

L-Block FTW!

Mario World

It’s an early-Nintendo family! They’ve even got Link. Impressive.

It’s always cute when babies get in on the action.

Now, you often see Mario and Luigi running around at parties and such. But how often do you see the vastly underrated Wario and Waluigi?

Movies

I love lamp. And I love this Brick Tamland costume.

Don’t you just feel warm and fuzzy when you see this costume? Makes me wonder what other people at the party were thinking…not everyone has seen Dogma.

More kiddlywinkies. Altogether now…”Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.”

Another fairly successful group costume, though the lady on the far right is supposed to be Poison Ivy. She doesn’t even have red hair. Pshaw.

Miscellaneous

Ha! Haha! Hahahaha. Nice.

The late, great Bob Ross is a favorite of mine. Seriously random, yet seriously funny.

Gotta’ love the lap-over in spandex. Oh, and the boxing gloves.

…Tom Petty?

And now, my two favorite costumes that I came across (the Facebook page is a close third):

Tobias Funke: Never-nude. There are literally dozens of them!

Drumroll please?

Every 80’s girls’ dream boyfriend ever, Lloyd Dobbler. How long did it take to make those arms? haha.

Hope you enjoyed this little stroll through cyberspace, and maybe get a few ideas for your own costumes?

About the Author: Anna is a self-described nerd who enjoys movies, gaming, and writing for her favorite website, Villaintech. She is currently pursuing a degree in Editing.

**Update**
A winner has been selected. Commenting has been disabled for this giveaway.

It is that time again for another giveaway. This time we have a spare Call of Duty: World at War PC Beta code. We intend to give it away by end of day tomorrow so be sure to post your comment.

To be entered to win this weeks swag, just leave us a comment telling us what are your thoughts about another WWII game in the making? Seriously, that’s all you have to do for a chance to score a beta code. You’ll have until 5pm tomorrow in which we will pick a winner at random assuming s/he follows the rules:

You may enter other VillainTech giveaways, however…

• You may only enter this giveaway once; if you enter more than once on this particular giveaway post you’ll be automatically disqualified and barred from all future giveaways. (Yes, we have robots that thoroughly check to ensure fairness.) You may enter future VillainTech giveaway contests though!

Two words - Sandbox Bliss. If only Mercenaries 2 could have learned from this game, but alas, they both came out near the same time. What this game really is to me, is GTA without the BS.

Yeah, yeah, I know GTA is the greatest game ever made on the face of the earth and blah blah blah, but do yourself a favor and either buy or rent this game. If you are a GTA fan and love exceptionally well done sandbox games, this game will embue you with gaming bliss. Unfortunately, I just got Fable II today, so I’m kind of out of time to play this guy, although I’ve gotten near 10 hours of death and destruction from this already, and a good 50% of that time or more, played in a very, very well done coop. Being able to play the game out of order is a sweet new technique that really works in this title.

The cheats are also sweet. You can unlock a ufo, abeit with no rocket launchers… but the animation while you enter is hilarious. I also recommend completing all levels of the activities, which they have made it much easier to do than the first version. Use a partner in coop to make it more fun, and easier to complete the higher levels. Doing the drug dealer missions in coop is especially helpful, as you can coordinate cars, and not be stuck with the dealers crappy microbus and his terribly slow driving.

The rendering in the driving scenes is a little bit edgy, but you’ll notice that rarely, if ever, will you have framerate problems, freezing, etc, as I can see why they did this… not to make it a crappy rendering, but make it just good enough to enjoy, and seamless for when there is almost total action surrounding you. The controls are also very well done, I found them almost natural, and very intuitive. I get a little frustrated with the weapons switch from time to time, but i’m used to the left and right bumpers or the Dpad for that. Given that, I found hardly anything else in the game anything less than totally enjoyable.

So Villaintechnicians, Halloween is right around the corner. What have you done to get into the spooky mood? Some of you have probably spent time picking out costumes, others buying bulk candy and creepy decorations for your lawns. Me? I’ve been watching scary movies.

I love them. And, from time to time, I enjoy revisiting the scary films that I haven’t seen in a while, just to judge if they withstand the test of time. Poltergeist, the movie that helped spark my irrational fear of clowns, definitely lives up to the hype that it has received as one of the scariest movies of all-time.

The film tells the story of a suburban family who occupy one of the father’s (played by a hilarious Craig T. Nelson) pre-fabricated homes that he sells. It is located in a neighborhood that is comprised of many homes that look exactly alike, all built upon a (what they believe to be) relocated cemetery.

Soon, strange occurrences, such as breaking glass and moving furniture, begin to shake up the mother (played by JoBeth Williams). Little Carol Anne disappears, and the film follows the family as they attempt to reclaim their little girl from the spirits who have abducted her.

Sadly, the sequels lacked the scares and perfect timing that made the first one so magically frightening. Everything is just campier and silly, including the possessed tequila worm in Poltergeist II, and the idiotic addition of the “mirror people” in the very sub-par Poltergeist III.

But the truly creepy thing about this trilogy is the chain of mysterious deaths surrounding it. The Poltergeist Curse claimed the lives of several of the films’ actors, including the adorable Heather O’Rourke, the beautiful little girl who portrayed young Carol Anne in all three films.

I enjoyed re-watching the trilogy, but the first film is undeniably superior. For your viewing pleasure, here are my top five favorite scary moments from the original Poltergeist:

5.) The Chairs
4.) Carol Anne’s Rescue
3.) Crawling Steak/Peeling Flesh
2.) The Clown (I know a certain reader will agree with me on this one.)

And the number one moment that creeped me out, the one that sends chills down my spine every time I watch it, despite its low-key nature, is…

1.) Tangina’s Monologue

After seeing Jacob’s Ladder, playing Silent Hill, and reading the Lucifer comic series, I’ve become a bit spoiled.  If a story doesn’t yield solid writing before and after the BOO! moments, I look for something better.  It’s been a while since these creepy cultural cornerstones were built, and I’ve been hard pressed to find new releases as good.

I went to Nellie Woe’s Comics to get caught up, and asked the counterculture behind the counter what the best disturbing and/or surreal titles were.  After passing up a title I can’t mention in polite company, I settled for the dubiously named Golly!, by Image.  The cover featured a gen Y-er glumly working on an engine as angels and demons battled in the background.  Oh boy, I thought.  I must be in for a treat.

The comic begins with a sideshow Satan, a Ron Jeremy type in a red devil’s hood and jeans, puffing on a cigarette.  The crowd of teens, as teens can often be, is skeptical and cynical to the point of bratty nastiness.  But after some carnie banter, the supernatural enters play: “Satan” rips his skin off, revealing a dry skeleton, puffs his cigarette, and asks, “How’s that?”  At this point, four kids simultaneously burst into puking the fakest-looking hurl stew ever.

The illustration is technically sound, with circus noir elements like a trail of cigarette smoke, low lighting, and the intriguing circus attraction sign.  Angles and perspectives travel all around the scene.  The payoff is decent, but could have done better without the “SSSSHRRRIIIPPP!” and the “SKLORTCH!” lettering; the images speak well enough not to need it.

So, okay, a carnie’s ripped his skin up.  Good expository work.  Next.  Cut to a glaring blue sky, points for contrast, and a subtle dig at fried food with a heavyset lady working at a booth labeled “FRIED”.  Here is our mulleted anti-hero, Golly Mulhollen, cussing up a storm on his back as he tries fixing the Octopus ride.  This presents a point of entry for a timeless circus stereotype, the brow-mopping Colonel, and his sidekick Miguel, a small wolfman.  Here the dialogue establishes Golly’s low status as a carnie go-to guy, and flings such amusing lines as “Ah, my hirsute little calculator, you’ve crystallized my thoughts precisely” and “Remember to clean the crevices of the folding chairs this time, lad.  The stench abides in them crevices.”
From there, the Colonel departs to answer a constable’s questions about missing livestock, and darkly advises Golly not to mention last night’s communal hog roast.  Golly storms off.

Then it’s a cynical look at modern insensibilities, as the Tattooed Man banters with a visibly annoyed Golly, who has to clean Satan’s mess and is jonesing for a chew.  A coarse laugh comes when T.M. apologizes for his language in front of a tender tyke, who rejoins, “**** if I care.  How’s my SpongeBob look?” Current, this comic is.  PC, refreshingly, it’s not.

A minor intrigue further cements Gully’s low-man status when, for $5 in chewing tobacco money, he agrees to grab Pig’s butt in the next 24 hours, or else pay $20.  Who is Pig? A good comic doesn’t give everything away immediately.

Segue to Golly spraying down the chairs in the revival tent; a Brother Dare offers new twists on the tried-and-true half-mad fundamentalist preacher.

More sharp, hilarious banter ensues as Golly, with a whole can of chew in his mouth, works on a van.  This time, Tattooed Man meets up with Pig, the fearsome fat lady.  Only thing is, she’s now a buff arm-wrestling amazon with balls to bust and attitude to spare.  Golly’s bet will be difficult to win.

He gets his chance in the next sequence, a mad figure-8 demolition derby announced in classic carnie style.  The comic does well to capture the chaos of a derby, and surprisingly Golly comes through in a laugh-out-loud case of easy come, easy go.  “Winning” the bet plays a large part of it, and through a strange chain of events Golly’s true calling is issued.

It’s during this sequence that the comic’s writing sinks in its hook, and takes on a deadly serious “save the world” air.  Well, as serious as you can get with a potty-mouthed carnie mechanic punctuating everything with profanity, “dude”, and references to “The Omen”.  It doesn’t turn out to be a total cliched wash.  Golly shows himself not to be a total chump by matching wits with a somewhat distracted holy emissary, and winning a concession should he complete a task: the emissary will answer a question of his choosing.  The writers make a wise choice not spending the series’ arsenal of fireworks all at once here:

“What about my super powers?”

“Done.  Good-bye.”

And that’s all.

After, one last side plot involves Golly’s determination to escape his surroundings, and “Satan”’s offer to reveal why he’s struggling… for a price, of course.  This exchange has teaser written all over it, but hey, I’ll be buying issue #2 to see if anything happens.

The final confrontation of the first issue gives Golly a mildly bizarre first supernatural enemy to fight.  Despite some adequate trash talk, the presentation is a little underwhelming and there is no combat until issue 2.  Not a dramatic punch, charge, gunshot, evil superpower, or wall-busting hero throw in sight.  But the way Golly! is written, and the way the pacing eventually comes through, I’m cheering enough for our slacker turned savior to bust some heads in issue #2.

In many ways, this comic is put together like the carnival attractions it portrays.  Slapped together and pounded into the ground, its structure, like a carnival tent, does provide the necessary backdrop around a story that has been told in comics for many a year.  Eventually, it gets so you’re watching the main attraction and forgetting about the staging.

Dialogue: Some sharp zingers divvied up among all the cast members.  Still not that much you can do sometimes with a guy who says “dude” a lot.  A-/B+

Art: Signs look photoshopped with poor contrast.    Characters vary a little too much from angle to angle, but the ink detail is competent and the coloring, while it shows effort, is overstated and monolithic at times.  And dig that salvaged cover art with Golly slapped on over it.  C

Story: Um, okay.  I want to believe though. C+

Characters: A bit of wisecracking in the place of character exposition, but a lot of times the two do dovetail.  A-

Originality: True, the issue starts with classic carnival stereotypes.  But twists set the series up well enough and leave the reader wanting more.  A-

Overall: A passably enjoyable read for something alternately gritty and grim, with a touch of otherworldly triangles.  I bet the series will be just fine once it starts running. B.

I just got back from vacation and there it was on my doorstep, saweetA! My special thanks goes out to T-Mobile for getting this pre-order to me 2 days before they were supposed to. I’ve only spent a few hours with this beauty so far, but I’m in geek heaven. We have some photos after the jump.

I never really coded much in java, but the elegance of the Android framework is really making me want to sink my teeth into it and see what I can come up with. I’m very impressed with this first commercial packaging of the Android framework, and can’t wait to continue updating this handset as the community adds more polish, and ever sweeter apps to it!

First of all, this is NOT an iPhone, so if you’ve wanted that handset, I would still recommend getting one of those: there are very specific features to the iPhone that are very unique, and set it apart from the rest, such as the elegant browsing and zooming features for the web, and the automatic screen rotation when you turn the unit. The G1 does not have this, but I’m still ecstatic over this gadget, I’m confident that as I learn more about its capabilities, I’ll be happy with it despite its small lack of features that the iPhone does have. Mostly, it’s the open framework aspect of it that I like, and that the framework doesn’t have to be tied to the device, hence the name ‘Open Handset Alliance’ that the Android project falls under. So that being said, and me having gushed about Android, let’s get into the actual features of the handset.

The foldout screen and full Qwerty board was a big selling point for me. The trackball mouse is also very well done, and can get you places quickly, as well as help you with editing text. The combination of buttons and touchscreen is also very well done, and I think this is what sets this unit apart from the iPhone. One thing I never liked about Mac products is the idiotic mentality of, well, they only need one button, or no buttons at all. I’m a pc guy, I right click… and I like my buttons. I do use the touchscreen on this handset a lot however I also use it in combination with the buttons, and that’s just slick.

As far as memory is concerned, this is where the handset falls flat on its face. First of all, no internal flash memory? For $300, I should be getting at least a few gigs, 4 would be nice. This is a huge improvement suggestion for the next unit. Also, the microSD card is annoying, and hard to get to. I have 4 regular sized SD cards totaling 8GB of memory that I’d really like to use with this handset, but no dice. The one positive aspect of this is that flash memory is always getting cheaper, so I should be able to pick up a 4GB microSD card for about $30-$50.

The back of the unit comes off easily for battery replacement, and SIM card access… so no complaints there. The phone also comes with a full stereo headset, which I was so happy to have right out of the box. It also uses the micro USB port, which is great, as this opens up the device to be used with many other products that use this connector.

As you also might have guessed, the unit comes with bluetooth capability, and I’ve also already got it reading from my wireless network at home, setup was very easy. My next mission is to find out how to get skype running on this beast!

Check out the perdy packaging it comes in below:

The NYC Cupcake Decorating Championships were held recently in, you guessed it, New York City. Nick and Danielle Bilton walked away with the grand prize for their contribution; cupcakes arranged in a completely edible iPhone. This got me wondering…there’s a national cupcake challenge?

Now, I’ve seen the show “Ace of Cakes,” and I used to love the Food Network’s Extreme Cake Challenge, but I wasn’t aware that there was an entire category devoted to decorating cupcakes. Just the thought is rather adorable.

What I love about the iPhone cupcakes winning is that a.) I could eat them if I wanted to and not die and b.) they’re current, colorful, and anatomically correct. Each button is placed exactly where it should be.

So, what did some of the other entries look like? Apparently the runner-up was in the visage of the Starship Enterprise, but sadly I couldn’t get a photo of it. Here are a few other nifty entries, however:

The cuteness of this post astounds even me.

Long before The Golden Compass, an old friend from Second Life opened my eyes to steampunk, an evolution of medieval fantasy with a heavy emphasis on ornate, steam- and gear-driven machinery, flawlessly integrated into the environment.

Talesworth Arena takes the Flash game to its greatests heights.  It features a striking medieval-steampunk graphic design and theme, with sharp writing, lots of extra quests, inventory and teasers.  Its ergonomic but varied interface, and a tried-and-true combat menu are upgraded with some clever and downright nasty tricks on both sides of the combat.

When you first come into Talesworth, you have the choice of an Engineer, Psionic, or Juggernaut.  The combat mechanics break down along the lines of old-school rogues, mages and fighters — physical trickery, magic, and brute force — but the ferocious creativity in this game blurs class lines and adds versatile but balanced outside skills and spells to each class.

You don’t get anything at the beginning of the game.  Zip, except 10 gold pieces, a hilarious snotty goblin who makes you sign your life away, and a friendly introduction from the local captain of the guard.  The Training area is the typical RPG weapons market.  But you don’t buy weapons per se; you buy offensive and defensive options.  The meager money lets you buy two cheap combat options.  The first one cuts your teeth on the joys of instant damage, and the second demonstrates Damage over Time (DoT).  The beginning options seem the same for all classes, but even the most basic items have their own perks and tweaks, and the designers have dutifully changed the basic item descriptions for each class to keep the role-playing flavor alive.  You won’t be able to afford anything in the Bazaar, the equipment market, once you leave Training, but it’s good enough; the moment your step out Grog, the Arena Overseer is already snorting, talking trash, and marching your butt toward the competition.

When I headed into the Arena for the first time, I thought Talesworth would have such a simple interface I wouldn’t need a second combat option.  I mean, games were always balanced early on so a guy could win with his favored weapon, right?

Wrong.  Talesworth may pit you against a puny goblin or desperate wretch in the beginning, but it also says “Hey, I didn’t spend all this time on this innovative interface for nothing!”  The interface begins every fight with helpful tips for the first few rounds, and a cautionary “Know Thy Enemy”.  It’s here you mouse over the enemy’s combat options and get an understanding of what he or she’ll be up to.  After that, you click to get going and a timer counts down.  It’s on!
Each combatant has a classic red hit point bar, and may or may not have a special resource bar (mana for Psionics, gas for Engineers, and so on) for spells and certain skills.  Once the opponent’s hit points are reduced to 0, the round is over, and gold, XP and maybe an item are awarded.

During combat you’re in a deadly race, but not to mash as many buttons as you can.  Talesworth’s ingenious setup lets you stack one combat option on top of the other as they take time to launch.  But, whether you really should or not, you can override what you’ve already chosen by clicking a third combat option.  If the first combat option has resolved, good for you: your patient planning will give you an advantage.  But if you panic and start getting ahead of yourself, you lose the equivalent of a turn by canceling out an attack on the stack.

In a mediocre game, Talesworth’s stacking mechanic might prove a decent standalone effort.  But the designers have ramped up the stakes with another mechanic: two levels of interruption.  The first level takes some time to execute, like the Groin Kick; after the Kick goes on standby, it still takes a few seconds to use.  And that, in itself, can be interrupted.  The second level, like the Spring Fist, instantly cancels the opponent’s action, which is crucial in later combats.

The designers illustrate the interruption mechanic handily in a combat against a healer with limited mana.  With unlimited mana, an opponent can heal himself later in the game whenever he’s down on hit points, which is a major threat if you’re fighting with no way of healing yourself.  In this trial combat, you can either put a Groin Kick, Psychic Blast or Gentle Uppercut (we all start somewhere) to work early on, and prevent the healer from drawing out the combat, or you can learn the hard way, but still win after he heals back a huge chunk of hit points.  Learning interruption proves dually useful in later rounds, when you can prevent either nasty offensive moves from harming you or cheesy defensive moves from, well, eventually harming you.

By the time you defeat the healer, you’ll have enough for your first item in the Bazaar.  For now it will be like picking through the remnants of a yard sale, but unlike many games, Talesworth will put them to use soon.  The shoddy items you buy will come in handy, because you’ve got your first Arena boss, Pepe le Tank, breathing down your neck and waiting for you in the next few fights.

Another tip of the hat to the designers though: if you still reek as a noob, you can go on an occasional side quest at the Arena gates and fight more basic combatants for more gold for more equipment and training.  But like a wise bartender who’s seen you’ve had enough, the game will eventually shut your gold flow 5% after 10 fights, and send you a friendly warning from a “gold farmer” while you’re at it.  I love this game… they’ve thought of everything!

Once you’ve gotten a few bosses under your belt, taken on a few side quests and pimped out your inventory, Talesworth will really begin to shine.  Most side quests are easy, but the Tavern will let you revisit difficult ones.  Skills will branch out along class lines, inventory will let you change up for different situations, and monsters will develop their own intimidating styles.  I’ll let you find about what the Runes do…

As a Level 4 Engineer I’m having the fight of my life against a Black Pudding whose skills include melting my armor, puncturing my gas tank, disabling my devices, spraying acid, and swallowing me whole.  Golly, I sure hope my Mechanical Gnat helps. 

Last night was the finale to Season 5 of my third favorite show, “Project Runway.” So how did the cute-as-a-button ubernerd Leanne “Lianimal” Marshall fare? *spoilers*

Why, she conquered, of course!

Leanne’s final collection was absolutely stunning. It was full of visionary, dreamy, and completely original designs, ranging from full-length gowns to pants, coats to skirts. The cohesion of the designs ultimately fell both to her signature use of “petals,” light swatches of fabric that were placed to resemble the soothing movement of waves as the models walked, paired with a lovely palette of creams and light blues.

Click to Enlarge

These were three of my favorite pieces. I feel she showed great versatility and, strangely, wearability, despite what seems like a lot of superfluous fabric. The pants and blue vest combo were judge Tim Gunn’s favorite, and for good reason. Stunning.

I was absolutely knockered when she was announced the winner. This quiet, low-drama librarian walked away with the competition, and her win was well deserved.